When It Rains, It Pours, and when it doesn't...

Gosh, I love getting comments on my blog! Sometimes I think I'm blogging just for me, lol - getting your comments affirms that I'm not alone, so thanks for letting me know you're out there! :)

Before I get into any juicy details about what I've been up to, I have to share this with you... Yesterday I treated myself to a one hour full-body massage. OMG! Now I've had massages before - many, in fact - but yesterday was the BEST massage I've ever had! Holy cow! This woman started with me on my back, and she began at my head, worked her way down to my feet, flipped me over, and then worked her way back up to my head. It was FANTASTIC! She even massaged my ears! LOL All for only $45, which just amazes me, because the last massage I had cost me more than twice that, and while it was a really good massage, this one had it beat hands down. After the massage I found out that this woman is actually a massage therapist instructor - let me tell you, I'm so impressed that I'm making a monthly appointment with her whether I can afford it or not, lol - and I've even made an appointment for me and my son when he comes home for the holidays. He's never had a massage, and I want him to experience a great one his first time. :) K, just wanted to share that. lol

Well, Hubby has been gone to Iraq for over two months now. Including the training he had to go through before he left, he's been gone for more like three and half months. It's been a tough time since he's been gone. I really miss him lots. Thankfully, we get to talk almost every day, which really helps, but its still hard. There is simply no replacement for the physical relationship, even if its just for hugs, and it really sucks that we still have 10 months of this to go. :( But I'm hanging in there, and trying to keep myself busy every day so I don't get depressed.

The hardest part of this time apart from Hubby is the lonliness for me. I spend so much time alone. Since I work alone, and I'm home alone, the only time I see anyone is when I push myself to go out on Ladies Night. But even that has its moments of lonliness. I've been out several times over the last couple months where I went alone. I just sit there in the bar by myself, drinking my drink, and hoping someone will at least ask me dance, or come sit and chat with me for a few minutes. It's almost worse than sitting home alone, because you see all these other people socializing and hanging out with their friends, while wishing you had someone to hang out with too. And the worst part for me is that I hate sitting alone and looking pathetic. I don't know where the heck all my normal party buddies have run off to. It's like they all dropped off the face of the planet. :(

There is good news, however. The last few months haven't been a total waste, as you will soon see. :) That's why I titled this post, "When it rains, it pours..."

We already know that I spend a good deal of time alone. That's the, "when it doesn't" part. When it's not raining, it like a severe drought around here, lol. It seems like these dry spells last for two weeks at at time, and then all the sudden, it starts raining like there's no tomorrow. We'll start with Biker Dude...

Biker Dude and I have been friends for a couple years now. And we've messed around a few times over the course of those couple years, but he and I have never had total-alone-time. Actually, he's kind of a hard one to figure out, because sometimes he's all about getting together, and other times it's like he has no interest what-so-ever. I don't understand it, but there it is. I really enjoy Biker Dude - the few times that we have been together, it was a good time. I like his kisses, A LOT, and I have to tell you, he's very talented with his tongue. ;)~ And when we do get together, there's a heated passion between us that rev's my motor big time.

Well, before I left on my vacation back in September, I started getting text messages from Biker Dude telling me that he really wanted to "hook up". We agreed that when I got back from vacation we'd make it a point to do just that. Then, while I was on vacation, he continued to send me text messages, telling me how horny he was for me, how much he'd been thinking about me, and how he couldn't wait for me to get back from vacation. These messages continued on until, on my way home from vacation, I'm sitting in a hotel room, and I start getting bombarded with messages from him telling me what he plans on doing to me when I get back. Mind you, I hadn't had sex in a few weeks, and the description of his intentions were really turning me on. Good thing I had my vibrator with me. ;)

I can honestly say that is the first time I've ever had "text message sex", LOL! He did a damn fine job of sharing his imagination with me. *grins* Of course, I was all about getting together with him in the real too, once I got home.

Even after the night in the hotel room, Biker Dude continued to send me messages over the weekend and into the following week. Finally, on Wednesday morning, he sends me a message telling me again that he's thinking about me, and that he has big plans for me that night. He knows where I am on Ladies night. So I sent him a message back, asking him if we should get a room that night, to which he agreed.

This all started around 10:30 in the morning, and from that moment on, my day was all about preparing for my time with Biker Dude that night. I immediately called my waxing girl and made an appointment for a brazillian waxing that afternoon. I also started getting my overnight bag together, with toys, lotions, and potions, prepping for the night. One of the things B.D. had requested was that I wear thigh hi's and heels for him that night, so of course, those went into the overnight bag along with everything else. Meanwhile, B.D. is sending more text messages about what he is going to do to me that night, making me slicker than a banana peel on a wet floor, hehe, and he tells me he hopes I have time for a nap that day, because he plans on keeping me up through the wee hours of the morning.

This is a big night for us. We've waited a long time for this, but in the back of my mind I couldn't help wondering just how long I was going to have him for the night, because he's got a wife and kids at home. Given that, I sent him a text asking him what time he'd have to be home that night, and he tells me the wife is out of town, so I have him all night long. This was just getting better and better. ;)

Finally it's time to head downtown for my waxing appointment, so I loaded up the car with my goodies and left the house. While I'm driving to my appointment, I start thinking to myself, I've got these really pretty thigh hi's and rockin' 5 inch heels I'm wearing for him tonight. Wouldn't it be nice if I had a sexy outfit to go with them?? So I head to the toy store and hit up their lingerie rack. I found the perfect outfit! Sheer black, open in the front, with a little leather trim holding it together right under my breasts, and leather collar to go around my neck. Sexy! Ironically enough, lol, he sends me another text while I'm there asking me if I have any edible body paint. Oh my! So I pick up some body paint and my outfit and get to my appointment.

After my appointment, I headed over the hotel we would be staying at that night, and got ready to go out to Ladies Night. I knew B.D. was working that evening, and when he works evenings, he usually doesn't show up for Ladies Night until around 11/11:30, so my plan was to go to Ladies Night, have a good time, and hook up with him when he got there. Well...

Around 11:45, B.D. still hadn't shown up. So I send him a text asking him if he was still coming. He says he is, but that he's bartending that night at another bar, and doesn't get off work until 1:00. Huh? Now why didn't he tell me that before??? But he assures me that he has every intention of meeting me at the hotel after he gets off work. Okay. As long as he's still showing up eventually, it's all good. I'll just continue on with my night, and head back to the hotel when the bar closes. That's only an hour away, so no biggie.

12:45 rolls around, and they kick us out of the bar, as is their usual custom, and I tell Lil' Pistol and Big Momma that I have plans, so I won't be going out to breakfast with them, and then I leave. ("Big Momma" is one I need to fill you in on yet, but another day, lol) With that, I head over to the hotel. Within in seconds of getting in the room, I get a text from B.D. telling me he's on his way and he'll be there in a few minutes. He was only down the street, so he really meant only a few minutes, lol.

After getting his text, I opened the door so he could just walk in when he got there, and I ran into the bathroom, freshened up, put on my new outfit - thigh hi's and heels included - and B.D. arrived before I even finished getting ready.

When I walked out of the bathroom, B.D. grabs me and kisses me like he hasn't "eaten" in a year - OMG! I LOVE A HUNGRY MAN! But keep in mind that I did some prepping for this night with him. I had toys laid out, covered with a towel, feathers, blindfolds, hand cuffs... don't forget the body paints... I was prepared! I also had my laptop with me for music, along with candles to be lit... so I pushed B.D. down on the bed, laid a yummy kiss on him, and told him to hold that thought, while I went over to the table to light a candle and get the music going.

Let me tell you, he was not going to be put off! As I'm bending over the table, purposely giving him a view of my ass under that sheer black nighty, he comes in from behind, gets on his knees and starts using his tongue, pulling me down on him. We actually had a bit of struggle with that one, because I was bound and determined to get that music and candles going, and he was bound and determined that I was going to sit on his face, lol - but I finally managed to get them going, and in the midst of the amazing things he was doing to me with that tongue of his, I eased myself down on him. Yum!

Eventually, we get off the floor and he takes me to the bed, where he lays me down on my back and continues to go down on me until I came like waterfall. B.D. is really good with his tongue, and he definitely makes a meal out of it. *she sighs with a delightful shiver* :)~ Then he helps me off the bed, and helps me out of my sexy nighty, stating that he never lets the sexy nighty stay on that long, but he couldn't help himself because I looked so hot in it, hehe - and, mind you, the thigh hi's and heels stayed on all night - then he turns me over, lays me down on the bed on my belly, pulls my hips up towards him so that I'm now on my knees, and he ever so slowly comes in from behind, hard as a rock. My G-spot was ripe and I had my second orgasm within seconds! He continued to take me from behind, until he reached his peak, and as he's doing so, he moaned like I've never heard him moan before. It was hot to hear him get off! ;)

In case you haven't figured it out yet, I tend to have an insatiable appetite when it comes to sex. I've been called a nympho more than once, lol - I can't help it. I don't know what it is, but so often I can go for hours and never get enough no matter how many times they get me off. I think that's part of it - since I can have multiple orgasms, I'm always ready for the next one. ;) But I always feel bad for the guys, because once they get off, it usually takes them some time to get hard again, and some guys can't go more than one round in a night. I can tend to wear a man out, and have been told so on several occasions, LOL!

On that note, it wasn't long before I was ready to go again, and I was in a 'no mercy' mood, lol, so after smokin' a ciggy, I walked over to B.D., who was sitting on the edge of the bed, and I got down on my knees, and began to use my tongue. *devilish grin* Lo and behold, he actually surprised me, because it didn't take long for him to "rise to the occasion", and before I knew it, we were going at it again. But this time, I laid him on his back, straddled him, and rode him slow and rhythmic like! This go-round lasted quite a while too, which was even better.

Do you know what I love? I love the feeling of a man's hands on my hips. Mmmmm.... that gets me all hot and bothered too. And the longer he hangs on to my hips, ridin' with me, the better it is. Just thought I'd share that. ;) So anyway... hehe ....

B.D. and I were at it for a total of about 2 hours that night. After getting myself off a third time riding him on top, and after getting him off for the second time that night, he tells me with an awed look on his face, that he's hasn't gotten off twice like that in such a short period of time, since he was in High School! I'm laughing, of course, but that really is a compliment. It feels good to know that he'll remember that night because of it.

B.D and I had a good time in those two hours we spent together. I have to be honest and tell you I was a little disappointed when he said he had to get home after only two hours together, because the way he made it sound, we'd be at it until the sun came up. But he had to get home to his kids, and it was already 3:30 in the morning, so I'm trying not to be too disappointed about it. I think the thing that dissappoints me the most is that the toys, paints, feathers, blindfolds and handcuffs never got touched. :( But at least he appreciated the outfit, and I'm going to hold on to the rest of it in hopes that he and I are not done having fun yet. ;)

Then, that same week, not two days later... stay tuned...

The Problem with Blogging...

The problem with blogging is that my life happens far faster than I can keep up with on my blog. I have so many back-stories that I'd love to tell you, but I just can't seem to keep up if I keep having these intentions to share them. So... I have decided that I'll blog what I can, when I can, and if a back story or two pops up, well then, so be it. :)

First, let me say that I just came back from a wonderful vacation visiting friends down South. I got to spend a substantial amount of time with Mr. & Mrs. WS, which was fabulous! Everytime I see them in person, I'm reminded of how special they are in my life. Truly the best friends in the world! *HUGS* to Mr. & Mrs. WS!!

While on vacation, I got to see almost everybody that is special to me in that neck of the woods. There were only two people that I could think of that I didn't get to see who live there...both of them men, and when I think about it, sadly, it's probably better that I didn't see them. But all in all I had a great vacation, and damn near partied my butt off almost every night. It was really good to see everyone!

I did see Sexy Man while I was there. That was a tough one, and I'm not sure I'm ready to rehash what happened. Suffice it to say, I walked away from him with the decision that I won't be maintaining our connection anymore. But if he decides he wants to keep in touch, I will allow that. He knows my number from memory, so there are no excuses on his part. If our relationship completely dissappates, it was his choice, because I'm tired of being the only one to keep in touch, and I'm tired of feeling so confused by his actions, and/or lack thereof. The one thing I do know is that I will always love him, and nothing will ever change that. But if it's time to let go, then it's up to him. I just can't do it anymore.

Last night was Ladies Night. I wasn't even going to go out last night, because I'm still recovering from my vacation, which seemed to be non-stop from the moment I left my house, to the moment I returned. The day after I got back, I had to work, and I still haven't really stopped since I got home. I'm looking forward to getting through this weekend, so I can get myself back on track.

Anyway, I did go out last night, as I said. Initially I thought I was going to end up going out alone. I got in touch with a few of my fellow partyer's, and no one seemed interested in joining me last night. Even still, I went out anyway, and I ended up being joined by R&R later in the eveing. (They are the couple we had that wild night with in the hotel room a few months back.)

I like R&R. They are a nice couple, and sex aside, I like hanging out with them. Last night seemed to go well. There were no intentions of "hooking up" - it was just meant to be a laid back, have a few drink together, kind of night. And that's all it was, from my perspective. But at one point, I got up to use the restroom, and when I returned, Ms. R grabbed her jacket & purse, stating that she was going outside, as she stormed out of the bar. I was a little confused by what had just happened. Mr. R said it was because she was ready to leave and he wasn't. Then he goes outside to check on her. When he gets back, he says she's ready to go home, so we said our goodbyes, and he left. I had sent Ms. R a text message asking her if she was okay, and she sends me one back about a half hour later telling me, "no". I still wasn't quite sure what went down while I was in the bathroom, but I decided maybe it would be best to let it rest until the morning.

So this morning I send Ms. R another text message, asking her if she was doing any better today. She sends me one back saying, "sorta". Of course, now I'm worried that maybe I did something last night to offend her in some way. Well, I managed to drag out of her what had happened, and apparently she felt like Mr. R was flirting with me just a little too much last night, paying an "extraordinary" amount of attention to my cleavage. OMG. She also said he said something while I was in the bathroom, but I couldn't manage to get that one out of her. Although, she did suggest that it had to do with me.

Mind you, when I go out, I hardly dress like a nun. She knows this. Okay, so I'll be honest and say that the shirt I had on last night was a "F* me shirt" if ever I owned one. The cleavage I put out with this shirt is kind of *va-va-va-voom!*, if you know what I mean. When I wear this particular top, I do tend to get quite a bit of attention from the men. The ones that know me know that they can comment and stare all they want, and I usually take it light-hearted and just laugh with them about their reactions. Well, Mr. R was no different. But honestly, he only commented once or twice about it, and then let it go. And the truth is that I didn't even know they were going to join me last night until I was already dressed and out the door. I know Ms. R has jealousy issues, and if I had known they would be out with me last night, I would have probably chosen a different top to wear. (Okay... maybe not. LOL!) But then again, she came out last night wearing ratty old blue jeans and a sweatshirt, no make-up, and her hair wasn't done. If she's worried about her man looking at other women, I'm thinking maybe she should turn her attention to herself then, and give her man a reason to look at her. Am I wrong?

So now I have to worry about how I dress when I go out with R&R??? I don't think so. I'm very secure in who I am, and I can't help it if she's that insecure. I won't change my ways for her. And I'm not going to deal with her insecurities about her man, either. That might sound harsh, but the woman has issues, and it's not up to me to deal with them. I have my own issues to deal with.

I guess one of the other things she got upset about was that we actually talked about sex last night. Are you kidding?! Our whole relationship started because we met on an adult website. Is it just me? I would think talking about sex would only seem natural based on how we met. But according to her, "we weren't out to hook-up last night, but Mr. R & you (meaning me, Lady Lover) can't seem to let the issue of sex rest." Wow. First, it was brought up that they were interested in getting together again. I agreed that I would be up for that. Then Mr. R and I had a brief conversation about what Ms. R is and isn't comfortable with at this point, and then the "sex" conversation was over and done with.

I don't need this. I think I'm going to have to tell R&R that we won't be hooking up anymore, at all. Her jealousy issues just go way too deep, and while she "thinks" she's ready to share and let loose, she isn't - not by any stretch of the imagination.

The good news is that Ladies Night was not a total loss. I met J.D. (she says with a big ol' grin)!

When I first got to the bar last night, I had only been there long enough to take off my coat, and get my all-you-can-drink bracelet. I hadn't even gotten my first drink yet when, as I'm walking up to the bar to get that drink, this guy asks me if I dance. I said, "Yes, but please give me a few minutes to get a drink." I think he took it as though I was blowing him off, because I got my drink, sat down to drink it and smoke a ciggy, and there I sat for most of the night. He never asked me to dance again. Although, all night long, every time I glanced in his direction, he was looking at me.

Finally it was the end of the night, the bar lights had come on, and I decided to go talk to him. So I walked up to him and whispered in his ear, "The next time you see me, try asking me to dance again." He grabs my hand, and tells me that he was going to ask me to dance again, but then my "boyfriend" showed up. Uh, boyfriend? LOL He was either talking about Mr. R, or this other guy I know that came and sat down by me for a little while after R&R left. Either way, I assured him that wasn't my boyfriend, just a friend. (Hmmmm... that would have probably been the ideal time to let him know I was married, but it just didn't cross my mind at the time, lol) Anyway, he kissed my hand and told me when he sees me again, he'll definitely ask me to dance. Yay for me! Then he pulls me to him and kisses me dead on the lips. Ooooo - Yummy!

Okay, so I don't mind saying, this guy is nice lookin'! Oh yeah! He's got that good lookin' cowboy thing going on! YeeeHawww!

After that, I went outside, where Lil' Pistol was waitin' on me to go to breakfast with her - she had just arrived from work. We're standing outside where the crowd is doing their usual after-mingling, and guess who shows up. Yep... the cowboy! :) He's directing me to come over to him, so I do, of course, and he pulls me to him and whispers in my ear, "What are you going to remember?" I looked at him a little puzzled, and he says, "You're going to remember J.D. - just remember J.D.", as he's pointing to himself. The he kissed me again. YAY! As I walked away, I told him my name, with a smile, of course. :)

Let's just say I'm looking forward to Ladies Night next week!

xoxo

Don't Envy Me

envy- 1: painful or resentful awareness of an advantage enjoyed by another joined with a desire to possess the same advantage
http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary

I dread hearing this word.

Last night I was on the phone with the "Dominator" - for three hours. He's the guy that my girlfriend, Cutie Pie, has been seeing, which I believe I shared with you in a previous post. These two are having some serious relationship issues right now. Somehow I managed to become confidant to both of them, as they both call me when they need someone with a willing ear to hear them vent about the other. I'm not sure how I managed to receive this honor, but these two are driving me crazy.

A little background history is definitely in order here...

Back in the January/February time frame, I had gone out one night for Ladies Night (imagine that), and I had a bit too much to drink that night (imagine that, again, lol) Mr. Cinco de Mayo ended up showing up that night with a friend of his... none other than the Dominator. Mr. Cd'M introduced us, and while we sat near each other most of the night, he sat one table over from us, holding a seat for Mr. Cd'M while he floated around the bar socializing. Eventually I invited Dominator to sit with me, which he did, rather shyly, I might add.

When I first met the Dominator, I really didn't pay too much mind to him. He did seem pretty shy, sitting there quietly drinking his beer, scoping out the bar, taking things in. When Mr. Cd'M introduced us, he did so stating that Dominator was one of his closest friends. After D joined me at our table I started to wonder, if he and Mr. Cd'M were such good friends, why I hadn't met him before now? I started up a conversation with him, asking him about this, and he told me that he hadn't been in town very long, but he had definitely been to the watering hole before and never remembered seeing me there either. Strange, because I'm always running into Mr. Cd'M on Wednesday nights when I go out. Anyway, once the ice was broken, we sat there having casual conversation for the remainder of the night. The more I talked with Dominator, the more I realized how cute he was. I also found out that he is only 26. Eee gads! Another youngin'! Although he seemed very mature for his age. He's also got a cute little devious smile that was starting to make my panties wet. ;)

By the end of the night, I was pretty lit, and horny. Lil' Pistol had been hanging out with us on and off most of the night too, when she wasn't at the black jack tables. When it was time to go, I needed to run to the ladies room, and Lil' Pistol went with me, but not before telling Dominator to wait for us by the door, as she is handing him my jacket to hold.

At this point in the night, I was feeling pretty good, but I hadn't had any intentions of doing anything after the bar closed, except to go out to breakfast with Lil' Pistol to buy myself some sobering-up time, and then go home. When we got back from the restroom, there stood Dominator, like a good little boy, holding my jacket. He looked so cute standing there waiting for us, and as we are walking out the door, I couldn't resist grabbing his arm and he letting him escort me outside.

Once we were outside, Lil' Pistol disappeared. I have no idea where she went - no doubt she was being the usual social butterfly with everyone hanging out outside. Dominator and I, on the other hand, walked around the side of the building, heading to the other side of the parking lot to our cars. When we got around the corner, I asked him for a kiss. (You know me... always searching for that next delicious lip-lock, lol - and when the mood strikes me, there's no stopping me, LOL) For a few minutes, getting that kiss became a little game. He was resistant to kissing me, which was driving me harder to get that kiss. He's telling me he knows who my husband is, and there's no way he's going there with me. (The story of my life *sighs*) When I told him it was just a kiss, and that Hubby wouldn't have a problem with it, he continued to tell me no. This bummed me out, so I said, "Seriously, Hubby and I have an open-marriage, and he really has no problem with it - it's just a kiss." He says, "Well, if Hubby were here to tell me that himself, I'd believe it, but until I hear him tell me that, we aren't going there. Silently laughing about how much I love the cell phone age, I grabbed my phone and immediately sent Hubby a text message telling him what was going on, asking him for his "permission" to "kiss" Dominator. Obviously, I knew what Hubby would say, and shortly thereafter, I receive a text message back from Hubby telling me, "Have fun! ;)" When I showed Dominator the reply, he immediately grabs my hair, yanking my head back fast, and kissed me so hard I thought I lost a lip in the process! Wow! (So much for shyness. It's always the quiet ones that come out of the closet in freak-mode, lol.) After telling Dominator he needed to be a wee bit more gentle, he apologized and kissed me again - this time a little more gentle, but still with the same heat that accompanied the first one. This lead to a pretty hot make-out session, which in turn had my head spinning and my juices flowing like Niagara Falls!

It wasn't long before Dominator and I were ready to take this to the next level, but before we left, I needed to let Lil' Pistol know that I wouldn't be going out to breakfast with her, so me and "D" went searching for her. Once we found her, she and Dominator started flirting too. Somehow, suddenly, there was an announcement by Lil' Pistol that if she was coming with us, it needed to be clear that she was there for my benefit only, and not his. Interesting twist. I honestly don't know how she even got invited to this little party. No doubt the Dominator had plans that involved both of us, which he failed to let me in on. I guess I had more to drink than I realized, as this whole conversation is a little fuzzy to me. All I know is that I wasn't really thrilled with the idea of sharing at that particular moment, but as always, I went with the flow, lol - On that note, the three of us headed to the Dominator's house.

Wow - okay, so I was already horny as hell, and Lil' Pistol and I had been teasing each other for quite some time, with every intention of hooking up when the time was right. I guess this night was the night, even though I was initially resistant to the idea! ;) When we got into D's apartment, it was only a matter of minutes before we were all kissing and caressing each other. I helped Lil' Pistol out of her clothes, sucking and licking her nipples, and kissing my way down her belly, until I leaned her over the edge of the sofa, and began exploring between her legs with my tongue. Somehow, D managed to get me undressed with very little effort, because suddenly I found myself bare-assed, with it up in the air while I was going down on Lil' Pistol, and D entering me from behind. Oh my!

Eventually we moved to D's bedroom, where we would have more space, and we ended up in a tangled pretzel, lovin' all over each other. I'll will remind you now of Lil' Pistol's comment about how she was only there "for my benefit", and I have to say, she stuck to that tooth and nail. No matter how hard D tried, she wouldn't let him f* her. She did, however, let him go down on her - which was hot as hell to watch! But when it came to f*ing, he was all mine. *grins* Fabulous! I really enjoyed this little threesome tremendously - each of us getting our attention in different ways - but all of us always pleasuring someone in the process. The orgasmic moans that filled the room that night were incredible. There's nothing better than a tangle of bodies, all hot and sweaty, with someone always touching you, providing a wave of orgasms between us - Mmmmmmm!

We spent an easy three hours having sex that night. By the time we were done, we were all beyond spent and ready for sleep. I actually had more orgasms that one night than I ever have in a single session of hot sex. This guy is amazing in bed! My legs were wobbly for three days after that one, hehe - Anyway *she says with a grin, ear to ear*, Lil' Pistol eventually announced that she had to get home, and since I rode with her and I needed to get my car, we left together.

An interesting note to this is that Lil' Pistol got in trouble with her husband that night when she got home, because she didn't let him know where she was at during the course of events. She says she told him she was with me, as well as what happened between us, but didn't bother to share with him that D was involved in this little ordeal. This really bothers me. I mean, it's her life, and I know she and her husband have a fairly good relationship, so for her to do what she did that night and keep if from her husband is only asking for trouble, in my opinion. The thing that bothers me most about it is the 'I want to do what you do' syndrome, which I believe she was feeling at the time. She is 30 years old with a mind of her own, but now she has a curfew - and a secret she will have to deal with the rest of her life. As far as I know, her husband had no problems with her being with me that night, as they had actually previously discussed the idea - but guaranteed he would have a problem with Dominator being involved. And now I feel bad, because my lifestyle has affected yet another person through the "envy factor".

It actually gets a little worse where Lil' Pistol and her husband are concerned. She and I had a talk a couple days ago. Since that crazy night a few months ago, when Mr. Pistol and I had sex with her permission, in her presence, I noticed she has backed off from me, not being nearly as "friendly" as she usually is. Given that, I asked her again if everything was okay with her and Mr. Pistol where that night was concerned. She swears everything is cool, but as she is telling me this, she's avoiding eye contact with me, which is not her style. I told her I wasn't getting a warm fuzzy about it, and hated the thought that it might have a bad effect on their relationship. Again, without looking me in the eye, she says everything is fine, to which I made her swear it was really cool between them, and if it wasn't they needed to let me know. She swears to me all is well. I have to take her at her word, even though I know there's something she's not telling me. Needless to say, I won't be going there with them again. It's fairly obvious to me, even though she won't admit it, that their relationship is not ready for this lifestyle.

Back to the Dominator...

D and I have had a few solo encounters since that night with Lil' Pistol. Again, sex with this guy is amazing! And he really is a freak! Totally into bondage, whips & crops, candle wax, and rough sex. I didn't give him the name "Dominator" for nothin'! ;) Mind you, I'm not really into all that. My rule of thumb is, 'if it involves pain of any sort, I'm not interested", although this "youngin'" has taught me that there are degrees of pain, and I have found that I am totally into things that heighten sensation without actually causing pain. One night he introduced the crop to me, and - OMG! - the man knows what he is doing! WOW! My motto: You're never too old to learn something new! ;) And, oh by the way, can we please add a crop to the toy box?! hehe

Well, after a few times together, I guess D decided that, while he enjoyed being a playmate - actually telling me one night during sex that I had one of the best p*'s he'd ever f*d, which is quite the compliment for a woman my age to hear from a young guy who is as experienced as he is - he decided that he needed more than just sex. He wanted someone who would be there waiting for him at night when he got home, and could curl up with him when he went to sleep, which obviously wasn't a possibility with me. I completely understood where he was coming from, so we ended the sexual aspect of our relationship, but have remained friends, and a few weeks after this conversation, he met Cutie Pie.

When D and Cutie Pie hooked up, D pretty much disappeared on me. I didn't hear from him for almost three weeks. Then he calls me one night to tell me all about her, and in the process tells me that he would love to have me join them in a threesome. He says he's been telling her all about me and the lifestyle Hubby and I are into, and then he tells me she's never been involved in a threesome. Mind you, at this point I haven't even met Cutie Pie. Then he tells me the night we were with Lil' Pistol, that was his first experience with a threesome as well. Are you kidding me?! Wow. I would have never guessed that in a million years. Seriously. This guy has it going on, and he gave us definite equal pleasure as though he had experience with threesomes. Anyway, he tells me that he has been wanting to get into this lifestyle for a while, but he's never had a willing partner in the past. He continues on by telling me that I am the "perfect" partner to introduce the lifestyle to Cutie Pie. This is something I have heard from others in the past. I don't quite know why people find me to be so "perfect" for this job. I know I should consider this a compliment, but it seems as though I am forever being the teacher. I silently groaned to myself when D said that, because I am so done with the teacher-student scenario, because it usually means the student gets all the action, and Lady Lover gets nothin' because said students have no clue how to do anything else but lay there and receive. In all my "experience", I have only ever had one woman that didn't need me to teach her anything. Might I add, it was GREAT! It wouldn't hurt my feelings in the slightest to have a few more female partners like her!

Ladies, if I may... for all of you who are, or may find yourself to be bi-curious, but unsure of what you might do with another woman should you ever have the opportunity, the key is this: If you know what you like for yourself, it's as simple as applying those techniques to the woman you find yourself with. It amazes me the number of women I have met in my life that haven't a clue what pleasures them sexually. If you're one of these women, it's time you started exploring the possibilities either through masturbation, or with your partner. Believe me, you won't be sorry. Once you find those things that really rev your motor and get you off, your sex life will improve dramatically. There is so much more to the pleasure of sex than just laying there and getting screwed. The best way to learn about your pleasure buttons is to get to know your body very well on an intimate level. You can't be afraid to explore your own body. Then you need to be able to share that knowledge with your partner. If you can't be open with your partner about what feels good and what doesn't, then sex is going to become more of a chore than a pleasure.

So, anyway... One night I was out with the crowd, and we ended up at Mr. Cd'M's house at the end of the night. D showed up with Cutie Pie, so I finally got to meet her. There's another one who is rightly named... Cutie Pie. She is cute as hell. She's 24, and just flat out sexy. We hit it off right off the bat and spent most of the night chit-chatting, eventually getting to the subject of sex. She tells me that she thinks I am sexy too, as well as beautiful *batting my eyelashes, lol* but that she's not sure how she feels about this whole threesome thing. I got the impression that D was pushing pretty hard for the three of us to get together, so I told her that I'm not into pressuring anyone, and if she decided later on that she was interested, to let me know. I was finding myself to be very attracted to her, and the feelings seemed to be mutual, as we ended our talk with a rather yummy kiss.

Since meeting Cutie Pie that night, she and I have started to become pretty good friends. Dominator left a few months ago for some military duty elsewhere, and Cutie Pie and I hang out together on Wednesday nights at Ladies Night. She and I have determined that we really want to spend some time alone together, but there has been one major glitch in our plans - Dominator does not want Cutie Pie and I to hook up without him being there. She and I have had some major make-out sessions since he's been gone, but both of us are trying to be good until D gets back next month. As I said in the beginning of this post, the two of them are having major issues, which sadly stem from his desire to explore the open relationship lifestyle, so if Cutie Pie and I were to hook up without him, if he found out, all hell would break loose. Which leads me to the envy factor once again...

As I said in the beginning of this long post, D and I had a three hour long conversation last night. During our talk, he was discussing the issues he and Cutie Pie are having. Without giving more details, because that would double the size of this post, their problems basically stem from the fact that he wants to go out and f* other women while he's gone, but he has a problem with her having sex with anyone else, because he's afraid she's going to find someone better and leave him. I'm sure you can see the twisted unfairness in this double-standard he's trying to get both of us to accept. Not. I told him that was bullshit, and if he wants his relationship to work with Cutie Pie, then he needed to keep it in his pants until he gets back, when they can work all this out in person. Meanwhile, he's also trying to get me to have phone sex with him, to which I told him yet again, how unfair that was. If I couldn't be alone with Cutie Pie, because now I've become an issue to him in their relationship, I most certainly wasn't going to mess around with him behind Cutie Pie's back, on the phone or otherwise. He wasn't too happy about that, to which I replied, "Tough shit." That's when he said it...

His exact words, "I envy you."

I cringed when I heard him say that. I told him my lifestyle is nothing to envy. He says, "It's not just the lifestyle. It's the fact that you and Hubby have been together for so long and made this lifestyle work in your marraige all these years." It always boils down to the lifestyle. *sighs*

Here is a simple fact: If my marraige provided me everything I truly needed in my life, emotionally and physically, this lifestyle wouldn't even be a consideration. We, as human beings, have needs that we desire to be fulfilled. If those needs aren't being met, we tend to find ways to fulfill them, regardless of the avenue we take to get there.

While there is a freedom in this lifestyle, and yes, it has it's physical pleasures, it also doesn't come without it's price tags, which can come in many forms. If you desire this type of life, I ask you to ask yourself, what is the appeal? And, what do you hope to gain from it? If you have a lifemate, and you are considering this lifestyle, or want to get your partner into it, ask yourself what you are missing in that relationship that makes this so desirable. It's one thing to enter into this lifestyle just to enhance your sex life, but any other reasons need to be carefully considered. When the sex is over, are you fulfilled? Or do you walk away still feeling like you're missing something? Above all else, don't envy me - I live this lifestyle openly, because it makes my marriage work. Without it, I probably would have ended my marriage years ago. That's nothing to envy.

xoxo

When the cat's away...

It's Tuesday, and as I'm typing this, I'm horny as hell. I don't know what it is, but since Hubby left on Sunday, it's like my horny-mones have gone into overdrive! In one respect, it's a real bummer because Hubby's gone, and now I have to be thankful for my stock of batteries, vibrators, and dildos, which are on hand at a moments notice. On the other hand, I am really looking forward to Ladies Night this week. I have every intention of going out and finding a playmate for the night! ;)

A few weeks ago, Hubby and I had a conversation about whether or not he felt comfortable with me continuing to live "the lifestyle" while he is gone for a year. I told him that if he wanted me to behave myself, he had the option to tell me so. I have to confess that would be very hard for me, but I was willing to be a "good girl" while he was gone, if that's what he wanted. Goddess Bless Hubby, because he says to me, "It's okay - go out and have fun. I know it's a stress-reliever for you to go out on Wednesday nights, and part of that is about letting the naughty girl come out to play." Thank goodness, lol - At the same time, I do feel a bit guilty that I will get to play, while he, on the other hand, will have very limited options while he's in Iraq. I can't even send the man naked pictures of me, because porn of any type is illegal over there. We were in a toy shop again a few weeks ago, and I asked him if he would like one of those simulated coochies to take with him, and he wasn't interested. Hey, at least I tried. I told him he, at the least, had to take a box of condoms with him, just in case he finds a playmate of his own while he's there. He agreed, while saying that he doubted he'd need them, but I'd rather him be safe than sorry.

I don't understand my husband sometimes. Seriously. Most men would die for the chance to be able to openly play around. But not my husband. I suppose I should be thankful for that, and flattered that he only wants me. If truth be told, there are times when I feel really guilty that I'm the only one that plays for the most part, even though I know that excites him. But I also get turned on by watching him receive pleasure. I know part of his "issue", if you want to call it that, is that his self-esteem is low. He doesn't think other women are attracted to him. He couldn't be more wrong, and I try to tell him that. I see women looking at him all the time, which I point out often.

Except for being overweight, my husband is a good looking man. He's got a full head of salt & pepper hair that in his younger years was a beautiful dark brown, the kindest eyes, and a fabulous smile. When he's not acting like a miserable, pessimistic shit, he's actually got a great personality, getting along well with almost anyone he comes across, and he's got a great sense of humor. I used to think of him as sexy as hell, and while I still think he's sexy today, he is slowly losing his sex appeal. That sounds bad, I know. I think "sexy" is a frame of mind. If you feel sexy, you project that out to the world. Apparently, he doesn't feel sexy, so he doesn't put himself out that way. My efforts to help him feel sexy seem to be for not. I know a lot of that has to do with his weight, which in turn has to do with depression, because he's so miserable most of the time due to his job and where we are stationed right now. I'm secretly hoping he'll drop a good deal of weight while he's in Iraq, if by any other means, then at least through osmosis of his circumstances. When he gets back from Iraq, I really hope the change of scenery will also turn things around for him, and bring back the positive, happy-go-lucky man I fell in love with 23 years ago.

Yeah - so - I totally didn't mean to go there about Hubby, but I feel better now, having gotten that off my chest, lol No doubt, you will hear more of my bitchiness and griping about him and our marriage over time. I have a lot of things I need to get off my chest about my marriage these days. It seems every time we're apart for an extended period, I learn more and more about myself. I think it's because I have a chance to explore life more when he's not around, and I always have far too much time on my hands to think. Lucky you! Because you get to be the recipient of all those thoughts, LOL!

So... back to Ladies Night!

I have decided that while Hubby is gone, I will continue to find playmates, since he is agreeable to it. But at the same time, I have also decided I don't want to find any one person to spend any extended time with. The last time we were apart for a year - just three years ago - I made the mistake of spending too much time with one man, and ended up falling deeply in love with him. Of course, I'm talking about Sexy Man. Wow, I haven't said that name in a while. Now it's confession time...

Sexy Man and I are still in touch. Not regularly, but we have talked every few months over the last year and half. Mostly it has been me keeping in touch with him. I will send him a text just to see how he's doing, and more often than not, it leads to one of us calling the other, and we end up talking and catching up on each others lives for about an hour or so. Our conversations always end with "I love you" coming from both of us, and then we hang up and don't talk to each other for a few more months.

As each month passes, the distance between us gets further and further apart. I had actually started getting to the point where I have considered simply not getting in touch with him anymore, because I'm always the one to initiate the contact. I have said to him more than once that it bothers me that he doesn't try to contact me in the interim, and he always tells me how bad he is about keeping in touch with anyone, and that he just gets busy. Hmmm. Yeah, right. While I still love this man, and he says he still loves me, I can't help wondering what kind of love he really has for me anymore, and often tell myself it's time for me to permanently let go.

From the moment Sexy Man and I started spending time together three years ago, I always felt like my time with him was a dream. I felt like I lived in one of those continuous states of "pinch me" moments, because I was always waiting for him to tell me it was over, like the relationship we had was too good to be true - and too wrong to last, because we were both married. Many times over the last three years, during our conversations, I have asked him if he would prefer for me to just disappear - if he would prefer never hearing from me again? He always tells me no - that he doesn't want me to disappear - that he loves me and enjoys talking with me. Often I have wished that he would just tell me to get lost, so I could bring some final closure to our once fabulous relationship. But in the process, I could never bring myself to end it. I have needed, all this time, to hear him tell me that it was over.

To this day, I still miss Sexy Man terribly. I still miss the connection we had - the chemistry; I miss the peaceful feeling that washed over me every time we were together; I miss the way he could always make me laugh, no matter how bad things seemed; I miss his smile and his touch, and I miss touching him, and feeling his lips against mine. I also miss the way he touched me, mind, body and soul, when we made love. My relationship with him was everything I always imagined a loving relationship between a man and woman should be, and everything my marriage is not - which is why I fell so deeply in love with him, and why I have never been able to let go of him completely.

I wish my marriage had all those elements in it. I often crave that feeling of complete and utter happiness in my life. Quite honestly, if my marriage was anything like my relationship with Sexy Man, I would never need, nor want, to be with anyone else again. The lifestyle I have lived all these years would be history. Yes, my relationship with Sexy Man was that fulfilling. But, alas, my relationship with Hubby is not, nor will it ever be, like the relationship I had with Sexy Man. And, so, I will continue to cling to 23 years of a life I have built with my dear Hubby, while finding my satisfaction and release in this lifestyle I have become so accustomed to. Remember, however, as you are reading this, that I do still love my husband. He has been my friend and confidant for many years, and we have built a relationship which, while it may seem unorthodox to many, works for us.

Having said all that, I will continue my confession...

When I found out Hubby was going to be leaving for a year, the first thing that popped into my head, after the shock, was Sexy Man. I couldn't help wanting to make use of the time apart from Hubby, being back in a state of bliss with Sexy Man. (No, our relationship was not always "blissful", but for the most part, I was the happiest I have ever been when I was with him - and the most miserable when I was without him.) In my heart, I wanted nothing more than to run to him down in Texas and spend a year being in his arms as often as possible. But in my head, I knew how dangerous that could be, because, ultimately, I knew if I did that, my marriage would most certainly end. But even knowing that, I had to know if there was still a chance for Sexy Man and I after three years of being apart.

Shortly after I found out Hubby would be leaving, I sent Sexy Man a text message telling him we needed to talk. I was very nervous about broaching this subject with him. Deep down, I knew this would be the ultimate test of our relationship - there was really only two ways it could go. 1) He would tell me that he wanted to be with me, in which case I would move down to Texas as soon as Hubby left, and we would both probably end up in divorce court eventually, or 2) It would force him to tell me it was over. As much as I dreaded the latter, I needed to know one way or another.

While I was on the phone with Sexy Man, we spent the first 20 minutes catching up on life in general. Eventually, he asked me what I needed to talk to him about. Taking a deep breath, and bracing myself for the worst, I began to tell him about Hubby leaving for a year. He, of course, asked me if that meant I was moving back to Texas, and he actually sounded hopeful about it. Then I told him that would depend on him. When he asked me what I meant, I said, "Baby, if I come back to Texas right now, it will be solely because I want to be with you." Then I told him, "I need to know if you are comfortable with that, and if you have any desire to pick up where we left off? If you don't, I need to know now." There was a long stretch of silence on the other end of the phone, and in that moment, I felt my heart being wrenched out of my chest.

I knew the probable outcome of this conversation before it ever took place. When I said I was bracing myself for the worst, I mean that to the fullest extent. His silence seemed to go on forever, and with each passing second, I knew when he finally spoke again it was going to hurt like hell. Then I hear him say, "Baby, you know I love you." All I could say was, "I know." Then there was another long pause, and he finally says, "I'm sorry." Trying desperately to choke back the tears, I said, "I was bracing myself for this." He said, "I just can't do this anymore. I do love you, but we will never be able to have the life we want together." I said, "I would have given anything to spend more time with you, even though we are married." Then he says again, "I do love you, and I never wanted to hurt you. I'm sorry." I told him, "I always felt like the love you had for me was very different than the way I felt about you, and I needed to know. Thank you for your honesty." Then I continued by saying, "I suppose this means it is time for me to finally disappear." To which he responds, "Please don't do that." I said, "What?" He says, "Please don't disappear. If you come down this way for a visit, I want to know, so that we can see each other - maybe go for a walk in the park, or have a drink, or something." I asked him if that meant he wanted to remain friends, and he said yes.

Can I simply remain friends with this man? I don't think my heart can take being that close to him without wanting to be physically connected with him as well. I don't think I can take walking in the park with him, without the usual hand-holding and snuggles. In short, I love this man too much to just be friends, but I agreed that we will remain friends none-the-less. With that, I told him I needed to go. I couldn't hold back the tears anymore, and I didn't want to sob in his ear. As we are saying goodbye, he says, "I love you. I'm sorry." All I could say was that I needed to go. I hung up from our call, and allowed myself only a moment to grieve. It wouldn't have been good to go home with my eyes all swollen and puffy, because I knew Hubby was waiting for me. I vowed that I would save the tears for a time when I would be alone and could fully grieve my loss undisturbed.

Since that day, I have tried not to think about Sexy Man. Today, however, I have cried over him while typing this. It hurts. But at the same time, I feel a strange sense of relief over it too. As much as I never wanted to lose him from my life, I needed that closure. I needed to hear him tell me he loved me, but I also need to know that he didn't want an intimate relationship with me anymore. I feel like I can finally move on with my life - almost.

You see, a while ago I started a scrapbook for Sexy Man about our time together. At the time, I also made a similar one for myself, so I have two of these scrapbooks. The last time I was in Texas, I wanted to give it to him, but things being what they were, I never even told him I was in town until the day before I left. We had a long conversation on my way out of town the next day, and he let me know how disappointed he was that we didn't get together. I regret not letting him know that I was there, but I think, at the time, it was for the best. But now, I still have this scrapbook that I want to give to him, because I made it for him, and honestly, I can't bring myself to throw it out. Anyway, since our recent conversation, I have decided I still want him to have it. I have plans to make a trip to Texas in a few months, so when I go down there, I will meet with him one last time to give him this scrapbook.

Am I crazy for wanting to do that? My head is screaming at me that I'm a lunatic for even allowing myself to see him again, and I'll probably make a complete ass out of myself when I hand him that book. Who knows if he'll even accept it. Personally, at this point, I don't care what he does with it after I hand it to him, as long as I place it in his hands. Then I can say I at least gave it to him... one last gift from my heart. Then I will say goodbye to him, and tell him that he will never hear from me again. Sounds kind of dramatic, doesn't it? Yeah, I think so too. I don't really want the drama - I already know I'm going to end up balling my eyes out in the process, probably in front of him, making an ass out of myself one final time. But deep within me, I know he really did love me at one time - enough so that he came close to leaving his wife for me - I want him to always remember that I loved him too. It also feels like its an appropriate way to bring closure to our relationship from my end. I need to be able to say, face to face, that it's over. So that's the plan. I won't be in touch with him until I have set my dates for the trip, and then I will plan to get together with him, even if it's only for a few minutes. I will hand him the book, and then walk away from him and get on with my life.

I am actually trying to get on with my life even now. It has been a long haul getting from point A to point B where Sexy Man is concerned. I have tried so hard to work on my marriage over the last three years, and it has been a tough road getting my marriage back to some semblance of stability. As much as I love Sexy Man, I also love Hubby, and I plan on continuing to work on my marriage. Being apart for yet another year is not going to be easy, but I know that I can never allow myself to have feelings for someone else the way I felt about Sexy Man. It is imperative to me that I am able to close off that part of my heart, unless it is for Hubby. I can only hope that Hubby and I can one day reach that point after all these years. *sighs* Which finally brings me back to our lifestyle, and the infamous Ladies Night...

Having been through what I went through with Sexy Man, and knowing in the end that I will remain with Hubby, I will continue with our sexscapades, because that is part of what makes our marriage work. I will get through this year, guarding my heart from ever falling for anyone else, and I will have fun doing it, damn it! lol I refuse to roll over and die - and let's face it, I love sex! If I can manage to find a playmate once or twice a month that can keep my appetite for sex satiated, then all the better for me! ;) While the cat's away, this little mousy is going to play, play, play!

xoxo

Let the Games Begin...

Hi Everyone! I guess you could say that I have been taking a blogging sabbatical, lol - there's been too much going on lately in my personal life, and I simply haven't been able to bring myself to blog about it. Not that things have been bad - things have just been stressful. We'll start with a few weeks ago when I had my third anxiety attack...

I'm pretty sure I mentioned in a previous post that Hubby has orders to go to Iraq for a year. We found this out several weeks ago, and since that time, things have just been stressful here at home. With all the information we have been receiving about his leaving, and everything he has had to do to get ready, it has put our life in a state of chaos. Well, between knowing that Hubby was going to be leaving, and everything else that has happened over the last several months, like Grandma passing away, and my Son's heart attack, I guess it was just too much for me. Actually, I thought I was handling it all pretty good, until I started feeling chest pains.

For about two weeks I had been feeling like I was having problems breathing, and I could feel my heart, like it was going to pound out of my chest. Since I have had two anxiety attacks in the past, I had a feeling that's what was happening again, so I let it go with the decision that I just needed to find a way to relax. Unfortunately, there was too much going on at home to really get to a state of true relaxation, and one evening my boss calls me to ask me to work for her the next day. I needed the extra money, so I agreed. When I got to work that morning, my chest started to feel like someone was sitting on top of me - my breathing got more difficult, I was getting really dizzy when I would stand up, and my left arm started to hurt. Within an hour of being there, I started to feel over-all like shit, and thought maybe I was having a heart attack. I ended up calling my boss, Hubby, and an ambulance, in that order. When they started to put me on the stretcher, I actually collapsed. Talk about scary.

It turns out that I was having a severe anxiety attack. These things suck. Honestly, for the most part, I'm probably one of the most laid-back people you could ever meet. I am so frustrated by these anxiety attacks that I have, because I don't understand why I have them. They come on like a freight train, and I have no control over what's happening. It's almost like my body says, "Girlfriend, you've had enough stress building up, and now its time to blow off some steam." And the worst part is that each one has shown more than one symptom of a heart attack. On the way to the hospital that day, they had to give me 4 aspirin and 3 shots of nitroglycerin under my tongue before the chest pains started to subside. And let me just tell you, both of them are nasty as hell even one time - yuck! Then they get me to the emergency room and start running all kinds of tests - I hate this process. Needles... I HATE needles. But in the end, the blood test showed no signs of the enzyme your body releases during a heart attack, so that was ruled out. They even did an x-ray of my chest to make sure I didn't have some kind of blood clot in my lungs, which is something I experienced many years ago, because I had pneumonia. That's some scary shit too! After the x-ray results came back, they determined that it was another anxiety attack, then they prescribed me the strongest Valium they had and sent me home.

Since that day, I have tried really hard to relax and find ways to reduce my stress levels. Taking the Valium is not an option unless I'm prepared to sleep for 7 hours. It's been difficult. While I am trying to "relax", Hubby was still swirling around me in a whirlwind, trying to get ready to deploy, with constant stories of his frustration about the whole thing, not to mention sharing stories with me that he has heard from other people about the "Iraq Experience", which I really didn't need, nor want to hear. It finally got to the point that, as wrong as this is going to sound, I was ready for Hubby to leave. I needed him to just go, so that I could settle into a routine for myself, and start trying to handle the time alone. Again, this is going to sound wrong, but I got to a point where I couldn't wait for him to leave, and I pretty much told him that. Thankfully, he understood. Was I looking forward to his leaving? Not really - only so much in that I knew once he was gone, we could both start dealing with this, and we both knew that it also meant we could start working on getting him back home again. The waiting for the inevitable was hard on both of us.

Now he's gone. He left early Sunday morning. He hasn't actually left for Iraq just yet, because he's got some survival training to go through before he goes over there. So right now, he's doing that training at another base. He'll be home Friday evening, and we'll get one day together before he leaves again for more training at yet another base, to which he'll be gone for a month. Then he'll come home for a week, and after that he'll leave for a year in Iraq. Yes, it sucks. No, I'm not looking forward to a year without him. I'm not looking forward to worrying about his happy ass being in a combat zone either. But as a wife of a military member for nearly 20 years, I know that we do what we must. *sighs*

There is good news at the end of all this, however. We finally have our hard copy orders out of this crappy place we've been stationed at, and we're heading South when he gets back. We won't be going back to Texas just yet, but we'll be about two hours from where we intended to retire, so it's close enough for the moment. If I can just remain positive, and keep myself focused on our move next year, then I'm hoping to get through this with flying colors. Time will tell.

xoxo

They don't call it "Ladies Night" for nothin'!

Wednesday night I wasn't sure if I was really going to go out. Fancy moved, so I don't have her to hang out with anymore, unless she comes for a visit. Lil' Pistol works as a black jack dealer most nights, and while she usually shows up on Wednesday nights, we won't generally see her until sometime between 11:30 & 12:00 a.m.. As for the guys we hang out with, as I said in a previous post, they work the swing shift, so unless they get cut back early, chances are they won't come out at all on Wednesday nights. It seems more and more lately that the ladies night crowd is dwindling down. This can actually be good thing for me, because I can freely mill about if I want to. The down side, however, is that I hate going into bars alone. It's much more fun if you have someone to party with, and I hate looking like the poor old lady who doesn't have any friends, LOL! It is also almost a guarantee that if I go to bar alone, I'm going to get hit on by every drunk, toothless wonder that walks in the bar. Either that, or it's the older gentlemen who hit on me. And when I say older, I'm talking the mid-60's+ group. It's kind of like my Dad hitting on me, if you know what I mean. *sighs*


I'm trying to figure out why it is that men my age don't hit on me. Seriously. I know there are plenty of single guys my age that come to the watering hole, but for some reason, they never approach me. The guys that hit on me are always substantially younger or older. And when I say "substantially", I mean they are at least 15 years older or younger. I just don't get it. As an example, this past Wednesday, I actually had not one, but TWO 22 year old's hit on me! I kid you not! And they were trying HARD! I can't help but look at these youngin's like they are my son, since my son is 21. It's messed up, lol

So, as you can tell, I did decide to go to Ladies Night this past week. I actually got a call from Cutie Pie wanting me to come out. I even hesitated when she called, because she's slower than molasses, and while she always says she'll be there early, she usually doesn't end up getting there until 10:30/11:00. That means I still have to sit there at least two hours by myself. I don't get this either. If I'm not out by 9:00 at the latest, then you can pretty much assume that I'm home, in my pj's, laying in bed watching TV. But for some reason, I'm the only one I know that seems to think going out means making the most of the night time-wise. Most of my party-buddies these days come out late. It actually bugs me, lol - Come on, People, lets get moving and go out and have some fun! :) I actually said this very thing to Cutie Pie when she called, and she promised me this time that she would be out by 9:00.

When I left the house, I knew Cutie Pie wasn't going to be on time, so as I'm driving down the road, I decide to make a pit-stop to see Lil' Pistol at work. Let me tell you, Lil' Pistol is a damn good Black Jack dealer. I watched her in wonder as she's slinging out the cards, calling out totals, and sweeping the losers paychecks away in the blink of an eye. I could never do that job. My brain doesn't work fast enough to calculate the card totals. I'd have to use a damn calculator! LOL I sat there watching for about 20 minutes, then Lil' Pistol got a break, and we went to smoke and chat for about 10 minutes. Afterwards, I said goodbye to Lil' Pistol and started heading towards the watering hole. By this time it's almost 9:30. I knew Cutie Pie would be running late...didn't I say that? Yeah, I did. As I'm on my way to the watering hole, I get a text message from her apologizing for how late she was, LoL. We actually managed to arrive at the bar about the same time. Damn, I'm good! ;)

For the most part, it was a mellow night. The band was good, but the drinks were going down pretty slow. Cutie Pie is having boyfriend issues, so I got the honors of sitting with her discussing those issues. The guy she is seeing also just happens to be one of my playmates, so this is a tough one for me. She knows about my history with her boyfriend, and I am good friends with him on top of it, so not only am I hearing her side of things, but he has also been discussing their problems with me too. I'm trying really hard not to get into the middle of it, but for some reason they both feel very comfortable confiding in me about what's going on. I love them both dearly, and they keep telling me they have the greatest respect for my opinions, which is why they feel comfortable knowing they are both talking to me about what's going on. The only problem I have is that I refuse to choose sides, which is not always easy to do. I will also call it like I see it, so I'm very upfront with the both of them about what I've said to either one of them, and if I see either one of them being butt-heads about something, I'll tell them straight up.

The tough part about the problems these two are having right now stems from the fact that he's military, and currently away for four months. Before he left, they had a discussion about seeing other people while they were apart, and it was agreed that they were going to cut each other loose when he left. Part of the reason for that decision was because she was supposed to moving to a different State before he returned, so they had no intentions of getting back together when he got back. Then he left, and all went as planned. Except they really didn't cut the ties when he left. He's been gone for a month, and they talk to each other every day... for hours at a time. I knew when he left they weren't going to be able to break it off that easy. I was right, of course. These two have a definite thing for each other, and now she's decided to stay here. But now this "open relationship" thing is causing some serious issues, which inevitably is going to tear them apart. I hate to see this happen, because when they were together, you could tell how happy they were. But since they have both started telling me what's going wrong, I've told them both that cutting ties now might actually be a good thing. They're driving each other nuts over it, and in the process, I'm going nuts having to hear it, lol I hope they work things out, one way or another.


Anyway, Cutie Pie and I talked for quite some time, and then the two of them started sending text messages to each other, which pretty much left me just sitting there with her, not talking, and enjoying the band. This is when the first 22 year old hit on me. He asked me to dance, and since I love to dance, I decided to tell him yes. We headed out to the dance floor, and his hands were all over me. When I'm in a situation like this, the best I can do is try to find the humor in it, so I pretty much laughed the entire time. He was pretty lit, and couldn't dance for shit, so he was more embarrassing himself than anything else. Then, you have to love this... One of his old teachers just happened to be there, and of course, she's giving me the evil eye, like 'what the hell are you doing dancing with a guy so young.' Hey! I wasn't robbing the cradle... I was just dancing for pete's sake. But when the dance was over, try as he may, I wouldn't dance with him again. Cute as he was, he was just too young for my taste, and the amount of alcohol he'd had wasn't making him any cuter, lol


I went back to the table to sit with Cutie Pie, and she's still text messaging with the "Dominator". I no sooner sit down and another 22 year old comes up to ask me to dance. What is it with these guys tonight? Is it "hit on the ol' lady night"??? I politely told him no thank you, but he was being persistent. Still, I wasn't going there, so I told him no again. About that time, one of the older gentlemen I know that frequents this bar also asked me to dance. To him I said, "Yes." I dance with this guy all the time. He actually has quite the crush on me, according to Fancy, who says he always talks about me when I'm not around. I already knew this, because he has made it quite clear that he thinks I'm the prettiest woman in the bar, haha, and he's so much as told me that he wants to take me home and treat me like a queen. If this guy wasn't 68 years old, I would actually consider it! LOL He is quite the gentleman! He took me out on the dance floor and held me really close. I had a little bit of a buzz going, so I let him. When we were done, he kisses me - on the mouth - and then he slipped me the tongue! OMG! He's never done that before! Totally took me by surprise, and he knew it, quickly apologized for it, and said he "couldn't help himself". HAHA! I'm going to have to watch myself with that one - I don't want to lead him into thinking I'll go there with him.

After my dance with the older gentleman, the two youngin's that had been trying so hard to hit on me returned. Now they're trying to sit with me and Cutie Pie. I told her she should go for it, because they were closer to her age, and she just looks at me like I'm nuts. Thanks a lot! What ever happened to helping a girlfriend out? lol The thing that kills me about these two guys is that they couldn't be more complete opposites - and they didnt' even know each other. That's when I got the bright idea to introduce them to each other, which didn't go over so well. One of them was all farm boy, while the other looked like he was from L.A. Central. Ironically enough, I found out later that he really was from Los Angeles, LOL So, upon introducing these two guys to each other, they both got up and walked away, LOL! I got a good laugh from that one.

Not long after they left, I was looking around the bar, and I spy this guy that I had spent some time with last year. ;) That was a pleasant surprise! I haven't seen him in months, and really didn't think I'd ever see him again. I can't remember if I ever got around to blogging about him, so a brief back story is that he and I hooked up one night at the bar. He actually works in town during the summer months, and then heads home in during the winter. We had hung out a few times together last fall, and one night he asked me to come back to his room with him. I did, and I have to tell you, he and I had some of the best sex I've ever had. We actually got together twice after that, and the only reason it ended was because it was time for him to head back home, which is about three hours from here. This man works a lot, actually working here in the summer, is a trucker during the winter months, and then has a big farm on top of it, which he works on in the fall and early spring. OH...and the good news... he's only two years older than me! YAY! LOL We're going to call this guy Farmer Joe, because I'm sure you'll be hearing more about him as time goes on. ;)

Anyway, when I spotted Farmer Joe, he spotted me about the same time, and we both got big ol' grins on our faces. I immediately went to him to say hello, and we shared a yummy hug! It was really good to see him! Especially with the younger/older action I seemed to be attracting that night, lol Then he tells me how good I look *grins*, and says he has thought about me over the last few months he's been gone. He then tells me that he came out that night hoping he'd see me, but figuring I probably didn't go there anymore. Surprise! lol He and I stood there talking for a few more minutes, then I see Cutie Pie looking for me, so I had to explain that I was with a girl friend, and excused myself , letting him know where I was sitting.


After that, I went back to the table to sit with Cutie Pie again. Yes, she was still text messaging with her boyfriend. *sighs* I was in a pretty good mood at this point, having run into Farmer Joe. Then who should walk into the bar? None other than Mr. Yummy! About ten minutes after that, Lil' Pistol walked in the door too. The night was definitely getting better as time went on! Both Mr. Yummy and Lil' Pistol sat with us on and off, as they kept trading time at the Black Jack tables. Eventually, somewhere along they the line, they were at the Black Jack tables at the same time, leaving me sitting there with Cutie Pie, whom I'd pretty much written off for the night, because she was still talking with her boyfriend. But I'm in a good mood now, sitting with a smile on my face, and dancing while sitting in my chair to the music. Then here comes Farmer Joe. :)

Joe sat down with us, with his chair facing me, and we start talking again. Now he's starting to flirt with me, making it pretty clear that he's hoping I'll accompany him back to the hotel he stays at while he's here. I would have been all for it, but then the bad news strikes. I had to excuse myself to go to the ladies room, only to discover that Mother Nature has just come for a visit. Shit! So much for that one! I went back to table, and about that time the band starts playing a slow song. I grabbed Farmer Joe's hand and we headed to the dance floor, where he proceeded to hold me very close to him, while his hand gently moved up and down my back. I have to tell you, there's nothing worse than being horny and having your period at the same time. While having sex during that time of month doesn't bother me, I know it does bother some guys. Knowing this, I had to let Joe know that I wasn't going to be able to join him that night. But he assures me that we'll have to get together soon. :) We finished our dance, then went back to our table where we finished our drinks. Soon after, Joe says he's going to head out, giving me his phone number again (which I had lost when my cell phone got run over by a car, lol), and then tells me I can call him any time. And believe me... I will be calling him! ;)

After Joe left, Mr. Yummy returns. I was starting to get a really good buzz going now, and I asked Mr. Yummy if he'd mind if stayed at his house that night. As always, he says, "No problem." It was coming up time for the bar lights to come on, so we all started arranging rides and what not. Then Lil' Pistol returns, and suggests that I go to breakfast with her. I agreed. Mr. Yummy wasn't interested in joining us for breakfast, so he worked it out to get my car to his house, and told me he'd leave the front door unlocked for me. What a nice guy! lol

Lil' Pistol and I gave Cutie Pie a ride home, because she had also had too much to drink. Then we get to breakfast...

While we're sitting there eating, I got a text message from Mr. Yummy that says, "Front door is unlocked - just come into bed whenever you get done." I actually had to read that message twice. From where I stood, it actually sounded like he was inviting me into HIS bed. I read the message again, and then I showed it to Lil' Pistol, asking her what she thought it meant. She says to me, "It says exactly what you think it says." Wow! I was not expecting that - at all! So I sent Mr. Yummy a text back saying, "Thanks. Umm ... guestroom?" He sends me another one that says, "Whatever you want. You know where I'm at in the house." Holy Shit! And then, holy shit again! Because I started my damn period!

This thing between me and Mr. Yummy has been going on for so long now, that I had pretty much given up the thought of having sex with him one-on-one. After he pretty much pushed his way into our little "party" last week, I thought that would be the end of it - particularly because he was trying so hard to get Lil' Pistol into bed. Apparently not. Wow. lol

Lil' Pistol and I finished eating, and then she took me over to Mr. Yummy's house. I have to say, Lil' Pistol had an interesting look on her face when she dropped me off. It was the kind of look that said she wished it was her. I felt a little bad about it. But the fact was, she also knew it was that time of month, and I had told her I doubted anything was going to happen once he found out. That didn't seem to cheer her up much, but with that I said good night and I headed into the house.

When I got inside, initially I wasn't sure what I wanted to do. Because of my period, I thought maybe it would be better if I really did just go the guestroom and go to bed. But something pulled me towards Mr. Yummy's room, so I went with it. When I got in there, I walked over to the bed quietly, not knowing if he was asleep or not. I bent over the bed, and it sounded like he was sleeping, so I started to turn around and tip-toe out of the room. I didn't get very far, as his hand reached up and grabbed mine and pulled me to him. He immediately started kissing me. Ohhh God! I really like the way he kisses me. But the reality was staring at me, and in between kisses, I let him know that I had just started my period. He says, "What? No." I said, "Yes, unfortunately." Then I explained to him that I didn't have a problem with it, but it was up to him. Well, he didn't have a problem with it, at all. My clothes came off, the towel came out, lol - and after four months of waiting, Mr. Yummy and I finally had our time alone. Even though we were a bit restricted as to what we could do, I have to tell you, it was well worth the wait! It was very different than our previous encounter the week before. It was so much more personal, and the passion and desire after waiting all this time really was incredible.

And thus ended my ladies night. Mr. Yummy and I laid there talking for about half an hour after we were done, and then I decided, given Momma Nature's visit, that I should probably head home, because I really wasn't prepared for an overnighter in that circumstance. So we kissed goodnight, and then I headed home.

When I got home, I woke up Hubby and I shared with him what happened that night. This always makes him hard, lol, so he and I also had sex, and then I fell blissfully asleep, while he got ready and left for work - But not before telling me how much he loves his "Bad Girl" hehe

xoxo

Sexscapades - The Aftermath

My last post ended up being so long, I didn't dare add anymore to it. I actually considered breaking that one up into two parts, but I felt it would break up the story too much and lose its impact of how long and yummy the night really was. Anyway, there's is a little more to tell, so I thought I'd continue in one more post. :)


Like I said before, Hubby and I were exhausted from the previous night. When we got home, we pretty much passed out cold - Hubby more from all the beer he had that night, and me... well, that was more sex than I have had in a REALLY long time in one sitting, so my exhaustion was definitely of a physical nature. When I got up later that day, I could barely walk! But I consider that a good thing, because it was a really good kind of sore - hehe - Even better was the fact that I got a delicious massage from Hubby later on, which helped tremendously. And, of course, as I said, Hubby and I ended up going another yummy round after that. Have I told you how much I love sex & Hubby?!

So after Hubby and I woke up and gave each other some more lovin', we determined that we were both starving. Neither one of us felt like cooking - who wants to ruin a perfectly good 24 hour period with menial labor, LOL - so we decided to go out for a burger. As we are sitting there eating we, of course, started talking about the night we just had. I was a little worried about whether Hubby actually enjoyed himself that night, because he spent most of his time either walking around watching, or sitting in that damn chair drinking his beer. Again he assures me that he really did enjoy himself, stating that he's never had his cock sucked so much in one night, lol - then he tells me, "The best part was watching those guys f* you!" And he starts telling me how hot I am when I'm f*ing, how he loves the way my body moves, thinking it's sexy as hell, and telling me how good my ass looks from behind when I'm on top when there's a cock sliding in and out of my p*. He also mentions that he was taking a shit load of mental pictures for his "spank bank" while he's in Iraq, because things like porn, phone sex, and the like are a big no-no over there. Hearing this was a downer, but then Hubby tells me that he really wants more nights like this before he leaves. ;) Yay!

While we continue to sit there talking and eating, my cell phone rings, and it happens to be Ms. R. She was just calling to tell us what a good time they had that night, and asks if we'd be up for getting together again? I said, "Absolutely!", also telling her what a good time we had. Then she says to me, "Can I ask you a question?" I said, "Sure!" She says, "Would you mind if I f* Mr. Yummy?" At least she had the good graces to ask. I laughed at her question, then told her, "As long as Mr. Yummy is agreeable to it, I don't have a problem with it." Actually, I really do have a slight problem with this, because Mr. R is still off-limits to me. It seems to me that if she wants to start f*ing the people I'm f*ing, then she needs to hand over Mr. R for some fun, don't you think? But the reality is that she doesn't need my permission to have sex with Mr. Yummy, because he's his own man, and can make his own decisions. Even still, it was nice to see her acknowledging the fact the Mr. Yummy was a playmate of mine - especially after that shit that happened with Big T a few months ago. Finally, someone with some manners. Anyway, I told her that we really did have a good time that night, but next time we're going to have to figure out a more private rendezvous spot for us, so that just the four of us can hook up, lol - and she says, "No, really, we didn't mind Mr. Yummy being there, and would actually enjoy having him with us the next time too! He's cute!" I told her we would let Mr. Yummy know, then we said goodbye. Hubby and I finished eating then went home.

When we get home, my cell phone rings again, only this time it's Lil' Pistol. She was just calling to see how I was feeling. :) I told her I was sore as hell, sharing a laugh with her, then I asked her how Mr. Pistol felt about what happened that night. She tells me they haven't really talked about it yet, and then she drops a bombshell on me. She says, "LL, you are the first woman Mr. Pistol has f*ed besides me in the 10 years we've been married." Holy shit! I was really shocked at hearing this. They were so quick to peel off their clothes that night and jump right in! I would have never guessed that this was new to them. Wow! I told Lil' Pistol, "If I had known that, I would have never suggested it." She says, "I am that comfortable with you, that I really had no problem with it." I told her how honored I felt that she allowed me to have sex with her husband. This is a big deal that is not lost on me. Then I apologized again, stating once more that if I had known, I would not have done it. Then she tells me, "Do you wanna know the weird part? It really, REALLY doesn't bother me. If there's anyone I would have wanted for that first time, it's you." Again, wow! I'm flattered beyond words at this point, and now feeling a little bad that I pursued that, but then she says she, too, would be interested in getting together again like that with Hubby and I and Mr. Pistol.


I have to tell you, in the past there have been several instances when either Hubby and I have introduced someone to this lifestyle, or I have had bi-curious women, whom I've turned fully bi. Every time it happens, it's like an eye-opening experience for these people that becomes truly life changing and liberating for them. It's not that we do this intentionally - it's just that we are that open and honest about the lifestyle to anyone curious enough to find out what it's about, and we are gentle with them as well, as we do try to make these experiences as enjoyable for them as we can. But in the midst of being a "teacher", there is a moderate amount of responsibility that goes with it, because not everyone can handle this lifestyle. Either they don't understand the etiquette that it entails, or they have jealousy issues that can flat out destroy relationships. I tend to forget this can happen sometimes. And when someone tells me this "was" their first time, as opposed to this "will be" our first time, I get worried, because I never got the chance to really feel them out to see if they could handle it. If I think you've "been there, done that", I'm also not as gentle, if you will. Not that it's my job to tell anyone whether they can handle it or not, but if I sense that it might cause issues or problems somewhere down the line, I try to steer clear of that. Anyway...


As much of a flirt as Lil' Pistol is, as openly as she talks about sex with me, and the fact that she has actually had sex with me, with someone else, no less, (that's another back story that I owe you), not to mention how quickly they peeled off their clothes that night, I genuinely got the impression that they'd done this before. Now all I can do is pray there won't be any problems for them because of it, because as of today, almost a week later, Lil' Pistol says they still haven't discussed that night.

Up to this point, I've talked to Ms. R, Hubby, and Lil' Pistol about that night. Then Friday night rolls around.

Late morning on Friday, Hubby asks me if I'd like to go out on a date with him. He wants to take me to the movies for a late afternoon matinee, and then to dinner. And since we're already going to be dressed for a date, I suggest going to our local watering hole afterwards for a few drinks before we head home. He agrees, and that afternoon we both get ready and head out on our date. By the way, we went to see the new Indiana Jones movie - not bad, but it could have been better, lol - then we went to Applebee's for dinner. Afterwards, we headed to the bar.

When we get to the bar, I get a phone call from Lil' Pistol asking if Hubby and I would be going out that night. I said, "We're already here!", and she tells me that she and Mr. Pistol are coming out too, and they'll see us soon. Shortly there after, Mr. Pistol comes walking in and joins us. I guess they were riding in separate cars, because Lil' Pistol had to go pick up Dee. (She's the woman that pissed me off the other night and I ended up telling her she wasn't invited.) So the three of us are sitting there, and inevitably the other night gets brought up, as Hubby cracks some joke about Mr. Pistol have a "green minty cock", LOL! I took that as my cue, so I chimed in and asked Mr. Pistol if he was cool with what happened the other night. With a shit-eating grin on his face, he says, "HELL YEAH!" Alrighty, then! LOL I guess that means he enjoyed himself! Not that Hubby and I really doubted that, because we had talked about how, when Mr. Pistol was f*ing me, we knew he was enjoying it. ;) I didn't want to get into the personal aspects of it by asking why he hadn't talked with his wife about it though, so I just let it go after that. Then, about that time, Lil' Pistol walks in with Dee, and they join us at our table.

When Lil' Pistol got there, she didn't seem like she was in a very good mood. As a matter of fact, she was down-right quiet, and that's just not Lil' Pistol. She's usually rather loud and obnoxious, if truth be told, so I started to worry about what was up with her. I kept asking her if she was okay, and in a rather aloof way, she said she was "fine." I am hardly convinced that she's "fine", so I asked her again what was wrong. Normally, the first thing Lil' Pistol does is grab a chair by me, give me a kiss, and then she becomes a chatterbox. On this night, she stood on the other side of the table, just kind of looking pissed. This is not good, being the kind of stuff I worry about when things happen like they did the other night. Finally, I pull out the chair next to me, patting it for her to sit down, and eventually she strolls over and takes a seat. I hate issues, and being the upfront kind of person that I am, I leaned towards her ear and asked her if she was upset about what happened the other night, stating that if she was, then we needed to get it out in the open. Again, she says she is fine. I said, "I asked Mr. Pistol if he was cool with what happened the other night, and he says he is totally cool with it." Mind you, at that point I really didn't think his "HELL YEAH" response was going to go over very well. She says, "Yeah, well, he still hasn't talked to me about it." Uh oh. I let it go after that. I was fairly well convinced that it wasn't me she was having issues with now, because she was throwing those evil-eye darts at Mr. Pistol when she said it, lol Unfortunately, though, it sounds like there are definite issues about the other night, but they'll have to work that one out on their own. Meanwhile, I decided that I was going to try not to show Mr. Pistol too much attention, because I didn't want to add to the issues.

By now it's about 11:00 p.m., and I get a text message from Mr. Yummy asking me if I was out, and if so, where was I? I sent him one back telling him I was with Hubby, Mr & Mrs Pistol, and Dee, and that we were at the watering hole. He says, "We're at 'such&such' strip club. Come over here and have a drink with us." I told everyone what was up, and asked them if they were interested, and everyone agreed to go, except Mr. Pistol, who decided to head home, saying something about the kids. We said goodbye to him, and headed over to the strip club.

As soon as we pay our cover and go inside the club, one of the strippers walks up to me, and says, "Hi Sexy!" And then she starts sliding her half naked body up and down me, LOL I said, "Hi!" and then got a little jiggy with her, then I turned to the bar and ordered a drink. Then we find all the guys we usually hang out with, along with Mr. Yummy and a few of those 20-something girls they all like to have around. The guys were, of course, sitting around the dance floor drooling over the dancer, and throwing their money at them. Being at this strip club managed to turn things up a notch or two, and I could feel the energy that was building in our group, especially with Lil' Pistol. I don't know if that was because Mr. Pistol wasn't there, or if her drinks had finally started to kick in, but she definitely started to loosen up.

So, Hubby and I, Lil' Pistol, and Dee all found a seat on a couch over by the dance floor, and ordered more drinks as we watched the strippers do their thing. I wasn't really too impressed with the strippers themselves, as they just weren't seeming all that experienced in what they were doing. I was, however, getting a kick out of watching these guys with the strippers, because they were all acting like they'd never seen naked women before, lol What is it about strip clubs? I have been to many strip clubs over the years, but as much as I am also attracted to women, I've never really understood the thrill of these clubs. I would much rather have a naked woman that I can play with, rather than one that is grinding all over me that I can't touch. Maybe some day some can explain this too me, lol

The longer we were in this club, the more animated Lil' Pistol got - and eventually, she's sitting on my lap kissing me. This made me laugh, because I glanced up at one point, and there were several men who were sitting in front of us who turned around to watch us, rather than watching the strippers, LOL - yeah, we were that hot! ;) Anyway, not long after, the bar lights came on and everyone was directed to the door.

Remember that this group we are with is infamous for after-parties, so as we're heading out the door, everyone wants to know where we were going. Mr. Yummy offers up his house, and we all head over there. When we get there, there are a lot more people than we actually expected. It ended up being a pretty big party. We're all raiding Mr. Yummy's kitchen for alcohol, and once everyone has drinks, we all gather into his living room where someone had thrown in a porn flick, as well as a CD, so we're all watching porn, and listening to the music. Next thing I know, Lil' Pistol is dancing rather provocatively, and starts heading toward me. Keep in mind that this living room is full of people.

I am sitting up-right on the edge of the sofa, and as Lil' Pistol comes at me, she pushes me backwards so now I'm half laying down. Then she proceeds to make out with me, as she starts grinding against me, giving me a very erotic lap dance. Honest to goodness, I thought she was going to start taking her clothes off at one point, LOL - and while she's doing this, I hear all the guys in the room reacting to what she was doing to me. Mind you, the girls that were watching weren't taking it all so well, behaving a little shocked, and making a few snide comments. I really didn't care though. My first thought was, "Grow Up!" I was feeling pretty good from the alcohol, and Lil' Pistol was really turning me on, but then it hit me hard that we had a fairly large audience at that point, so I stopped Lil' Pistol from what she was doing. She decided she wasn't having any of that, and continued to bump and grind against me until the song was over. Then I looked around the room, and apparently this whole scenario had made a few people uncomfortable as they all cleared the room, except for Hubby, Mr. Yummy, Dee, and one other guy who was sitting in his seat with his mouth gaping wide open. With that, I got up off the sofa and went to fix myself another drink.

For the rest of the night, Lil' Pistol followed me around the house, kissing me and throwing major sexual connotations my way. I guess I was equally as bad, because I was kissing her back, as well as dirty dancing with her at every turn. If there weren't so many freakin' people there that were so young, I would have probably stripped Lil' Pistol and had my way with her! This, of course, is part of the aftermath from the other night. We're obviously still feeling the heat from it, and being at a strip club that night only added fuel to the fire. It would have been very easy to just get naked and do it all over again!

Somewhere along the line, Lil' Pistol disappeared - I think she must have gone to the bathroom or something, but I took the opportunity to join Hubby and Mr. Yummy, who were sitting on the couch talking. When I joined them, they were talking about none other than Wednesday nights sexscapades. I took this opportunity to ask Mr. Yummy if he had a good time the other night, because that was his first "group" experience. He says, "HELL YEAH!" It's good to know these guys had such a good time that night, LOL - Then I asked him if he'd be interested in doing it again, to which he eagerly says again, "HELL YEAH!" Then I told him about Ms. R's request to f* him, and his "HELL YEAH" faded more to an, "Okay." That actually made me feel good, because he sounded more like he'd be willing to do it for the sake of the party than anything else. With everyone eager to get together again, it looks like we have another meet-up planned for the near future. ;)

After this conversation with Mr. Yummy, Lil' Pistol suddenly reappeared. Right about now, I had caught the rhythm of the song that was playing, and I had started to dance, grinding against Hubby. Lil' Pistol comes over, and politely moves me out of the way as she takes over giving Hubby a lap dance, and in the process starts kissing him. Whoa! I honestly didn't mind, but the look on Hubby's face told me that she completely caught him off guard! I let her go for it, figuring that if Hubby had a problem with it, he'd let her know. I guess he didn't, because she was still kissing him, hehe I was so tempted to give Mr. Yummy a lap dance too, but there were too many of his buddies around, so I decided it probably wouldn't be a good idea. With that thought, I sat between Hubby and Mr. Yummy while Lil' Pistol worked on Hubby.

It really is too bad that there were so many people there that night. There was definite sexual energy floating between the four of us, and I have no doubt that if we had been alone, there would have been some great sex involved. But it was about 3:30 in the morning now, and I had to work the next day, so it was time to go home.

As we are getting ready to leave, Lil' Pistol disappeared, and she was our ride, so I went to go find her. I go to the kitchen, and there she is standing there talking to Mr. Yummy. When I walked up, she immediately pulls my shirt down, exposing my breasts and starts sucking on my nipples, while Mr.Yummy watched. I reciprocated, and then things started to get a little hot and heavy between us. Mr. Yummy finally says, "My turn!" as he lifts up his shirt, exposing his chest to us. Lil' Pistol and I immediately went to work sucking Mr. Yummy's nipples, and when I heard him moan, I reached down to start stroking his cock through his jeans. He was hard as a rock. I felt a little bad for Mr. Yummy, because I knew as much as this was turning him on, there wasn't going to be any sex that night. Let's face it - after the stuff that happened the other night between Mr. Yummy and Lil' Pistol, while she's really good at getting men to want her, in the end, it wasn't going to go any further. Although, I know Mr. Yummy still wishes he could f* her, and I'm getting the definite impression that Lil' Pistol is actually contemplating this thing with him. If she isn't, then I think it's pretty wrong on her part to keep making him think there might be a possibility of it, but those two will have to work that one out between them.

Hubby is now waiting outside for us to leave, along with Dee, so I finally told Lil' Pistol we had to get going. She agreed, and off we went, leaving poor Mr. Yummy standing there with his hard-on.

We finally made it home that night, and as soon as Hubby and I got into our bedroom, the clothes were gone and Hubby and I were going at it. Afterwards, I fell dead asleep for two whole hours before I had to get up to go to work. Yes, Saturday was a very long day at work.

As of this point, as you can probably tell, I had been feeling everyone out about what happened that night, mostly trying to make sure everyone was cool with everything that went on. There's nothing worse than having a night like that only to find out later that there were issues somewhere down the line. If everyone was willing to do it again, its better to know those issues beforehand. The only one I hadn't talked to yet was Mr. R.


I made it through my weekend at work, and woke up Monday morning feeling refreshed. When I get up in the morning, one of the first things I do is log on to my computer while my coffee is brewing. On this morning, I no sooner log on when Mr. R sends me an instant message telling me what a great time he had the other night. :) Then he tells me the only downer to the whole night was that he didn't get to f* me. He explained that Ms. R is having some serious insecurity issues about seeing him have sex with other women. Then he tells me, "If she can't see me f*ing you, she won't have any issues." On that note, he says to me that he has to run, because he's at work, so it ended up being a short conversation. I was just glad to hear he had a good time that night, even though Ms. R was the only one who was allowed to give him the majority of attention. Before he logged off, he ended the conversation with, "We really have to get together again!" Then we said good-bye.


Since that night, there have been additional conversations about getting together for round 2, although I am getting the definite impression that it will much different from the first time. I guess we'll have to wait and see, but I'll definitely keep you "posted". ;)

xoxo